one way to look at things

a friend and i came to the conclusion the other day that relationships are very tricky no matter where you are in your faith. in fact, you can be deceived into thinking that you're better off just cuz your criteria's changed and you're looking for someone with a good heart instead of judging how hot they are. not to equate the two or anything, but check it out (i'm watching too much american idol)...... they bring about the same effect. like, "wow, he's hot and has a nice car and makes a lot of money... i want him!" vs. "wow, he's an awesome worship leader and he's involved in a gazillion ministries and has a heart for God's people... i want him!" either way, you get stirred up. either way, all these crazy thoughts come into your head, and if you let them run wild, you risk becoming infatuated and then you begin to wonder whether this may be the right person for you (even though a bunch of other people could qualify) and before you know it, bye-bye objectivity!! now, let's say both situations result in relationships... girl A begins to have problems with the hot rich guy cuz he spends so much time working (to make all that money) that they hardly spend any quality time together. at least her definition of quality, whatever that means... it's enough to know that his definition is a lot different from hers. boy, she didn't see that one coming. and then there's girl B who is also beginning to experience problems because her guy gets the calling to serve in southeast asia whereas she's convinced of her calling to serve in the local church. what to do, what to do?? she didn't see that one coming either.

the point is, no matter what qualities you're looking for, you're still taking a risk if you make that decision on your own. don't be fooled just cuz the qualities you're looking for aren't as "superficial" as they used to be. that doesn't make the other person any more right for you, nor does it make you a better judge of who is right for you. you gotta give it to God each and every single time, and more so if you think you're further along spiritually than you used to be, cuz it's so easy to get caught up in the "i-know-better-now-than-i-did-before" mentality. if you've ever been there, you'll know how tough it really is to truly let go of your desires and have to lay it before God every.single.time.